You have no idea how much time it took me to get around to watching Aquaman! However, when I finally got to watch it… let’s just say I was in a state of slight puzzlement. I really didn’t know how I was feeling about the film. Not that I had had high expectations for it. I’d been well aware that Aquaman wasn’t one of the highly esteemed characters in the superhero community. He seemed to be something of a laughing stock among nerds, too. Nevertheless, as an open-minded person and one that – above all – trusts empirical evidence, I approached the task with an open mind and an open heart. Unfortunately, by the end I found myself willing to quote Raj from The Big Bang Theory. You know how it goes, so sing along: ‘Aquaman sucks! He sucks under water. He sucks fish pee…’ Everybody!
No, but seriously. I don’t think Aquaman sucks as a superhero. And I don’t think that James Momoa sucks as Aquaman. In fact, he was one of the reasons I wanted to see the film. It’s not because I find him dashing or anything. I’m simply fascinated by Polynesia, its history, its people, and their culture. And so I thought: Who would be better suited for the role of the King of the Seven Seas than a descendant of the most skillful seamen that sailed the Pacific? Right?
I don’t want to sound political but in the light of recent events concerning Mauna Kea, the sacred mountain in Hawai’i, I feel the need to deepen my knowledge on the islands of the Pacific Ocean. Don’t worry, I know that Aquaman is not a documentary. And I know that only bits of the film were actually shot in the Pacific Ocean. However, whenever an opportunity to see some elements of the Polynesian cultural arena (animate – like Jason, or less animate – like the landscapes) presents itself, I jump at that chance without hesitation. Perhaps that’s why I enjoy films featuring the Rock. Or maybe it’s the muscular body and beguiling smile… we’ll never know.
Anyway, I strongly believe that Polynesian culture – as well as all other ancient cultures in the world, in fact – should be kept alive. I do my bit by dancing hula and learning a little Hawaiian in my free time. Although I don’t think I’ll ever be able to read books in Hawaiian, I’d love to thank my kumu ‘ōlelo Hawai’i (Hawaiian language teacher – I’m sure you’ve noticed the reverse word order. Fun!) and all my kumu hula along with my hula sisters. Mahalo!
But enough about my leisure time activities.
So, Jason Momoa isn’t half bad as Aquaman, as he makes the character seem less of a wuss. I grant you, there are a few long-ish moments when he acts like a proper puss. However, the bad-ass coat he wears on the surface makes up for all his shortcomings.
Why don’t I think that Aquaman sucks as a superhero? The guy can breathe and talk underwater! How cool is that?! I know it doesn’t sound like much. However, when we consider two of my favourite superheroes, i.e. Batman and Ironman, they’re basically just men. Sure, fit, well-built, strong, resilient, intelligent, rich, handsome, charming… where was I going with that? Oh, they are men with top-notch gear and gadgets, but men nonetheless. No superpowers, no innate ability to fly, no laser eyes, talking to fleas, or understanding orchids. And I adore them anyway. So why should I judge Aquaman for not being able to fly? A deficiency that has been pointed out by jokers and haters on numerous occasions. Just google ‘Aquaman jokes’ – if you haven’t seen a sh%@#-load of them yet – and you’re in for a medley of memes and really cheesy thigh-slappers produced at the expense of Aquaman. I think that the time has come to put them all to bed, though. Jason Momoa has officially turned Aquaman from a weird guy riding fish to a no-nonsense ass-kicking underwater fighter!
What’s more, I quite liked Nicole Kidman (a superhero name already) as Atlanna. She was an awesome fighter. I greatly enjoyed the first scene due to three elements: the storm, the dog and the tea drinking. The last thing immediately calls to mind Sheldon’s obsessive insisting on serving hot beverages to people in distress. Remember what took place over this first shared mug of tea? That’s the moment Aquaman’s parents introduce themselves to each other. Mummy says: ‘Atlanna – Queen of Atlantis’. Daddy says: ‘I’m Tom. Keeper of Lighthouse.’ A glorious moment, surely. However, what caught my attention was the lack of ‘the’ in Keeper of Lighthouse. It sounded great and it got me thinking how nicely he played with the use of (the lack of, to be more precise) articles to express his position in the hierarchy, rather than simply stating his job (a keeper). You might think that it’s an odd thing to consider 3 or 4 minutes into a film you’ve been waiting months to see. It may be odd, but I get distracted but odd things like that. Especially the use of articles.
They are so confusing that simply knowing the actual rules can only help you to a limited extent. It’s great to know the fixed ones that almost (remember we are still talking about English here) always work and can be referred to at any time. We must bear in mind though, that there are some general rules that may have to be adapted to a specific communication context. In which case, it is crucial to be flexible in applying those rules. I know, it’s not what you want to hear from an English teacher who is supposed to make things clearer for you. However, if you’ve come here to get some words of comfort, you’ve come to the wrong place. It is what it is and we all have to start somewhere. Never forget that exposure is the key, so the more quality input you get, the better you become at making these tough decisions faster and more accurately.
LEARNING TIP: listen to as much English as you can and repeat aloud whole phrases and sentences, including articles. This will create in your brain a handy database of expressions that you will not doubt or question while speaking. And, when asked: ‘Why did you use the in this sentence’, you’ll be able to proudly say: ‘Because it sounds right’.
I have noticed many times a phenomenon that appears among my students. Even while reading a passage that – supposedly – is written in correct English, they skip some articles. I attribute this to a few things, actually. One of them is the obvious stress they are submitted to during my lessons. Another is the lack concentration and eagerness to finish reading out loud as soon as possible. But the inability to ‘hear’ the phrase in its entirety is definitely in the top three.
So, listen, listen, and listen again!
And in the meantime, check out the cheat-sheet that follows.
INDEFINITE ARTICLE: A / AN (a boy / an apple)
| WHEN TO USE? | HOW TO USE? |
| only and always before singular countable nouns never before plural countable nouns never before uncountable nouns | a bottle, an orange They have a nice house and two cars. They have many houses in this town. Have you got meat? |
| before professions (singular) | He’s a doctor. She’s a villain… so most probably also a doctor. You’re a superhero. Just believe in yourself, man! Or woman! |
| when we talk about prices, speed, or frequency of activities | Aquaman can swim 3 kilometres a second, which is 10,950 kilometres an hour. (according to Justice League reports) He needs to eat a few kilos of bananas and nuts a day. |
| before big numerals instead of one | He flies a hundred kilometres an hour. Clearly, not Aquaman. |
DEFINITE ARTICLE: THE (the boy / the boys)
| WHEN TO USE? | HOW TO USE? |
| when we mention something for the second time in the conversation | I saw a big fish in your bath. The fish was pink! |
| when we talk about a person or a thing which our interlocutor can easily identify | I must go to the post office. BUT: Is there a post office near here? |
| when we talk about particular people or things | The music in that film was amazing! BUT: I love pop music. (in general) |
| when we talk about a person or a thing that is one of a kind | the sky, the moon, the earth, the sea, the ground, the country (= rural area) You killed innocent people, so you ask the sea for mercy. BUT: Superman can travel in space. ALSO: Turn off the light! …meaning this particular source of light in the room. |
| in particular time phrases | in the morning, in the afternoon, in the evening, during the day BUT: at night |
| in superlative form of adjectives and first, second, etc. | Aquaman is the best. He has the coolest tattoos. It’s not the first time he did something stupid. |
| when we use plural forms of surnames or place names | The Simpsons kick ass. BUT: Marge Simpson has freaky hair. the Alps, the Andes, the Canary Islands, the United States, the Netherlands BUT: Switzerland, Argentina, Spain, Oregon, Holland |
| with place names that contain republic, kingdom and the aforementioned states | the United Kingdom, the Czech Republic |
| with nationalities (as groups) | the Spanish, the Scots, the Germans, the Klingons BUT: I’m Polish… and probably a little Elvish. |
| with names of oceans, seas, rivers, deserts, peninsulas, geographical areas, and points on the globe | somewhere in… the Atlantic (Ocean), the North Sea, the Nile, the Sahara (Desert), the Hel Peninsula (that’s in Poland), the East, the South Pole BUT: Lake Tahoe, northern Italy |
| before proper names consisting of adjective + noun or noun + of + noun | the National Gallery, the Museum of Modern Art, the north of Italy |
| with names of hotels, pubs and restaurants, unless the name of the facility is the name of the owner | the Ritz (Hotel), the King’s Head, the Prancing Pony BUT: Mary’s Hotel, Brown’s Inn |
| with musical instruments (as ‘an ability’) | I loved the scene where an octopus was playing the drums! |
| in fixed expressions like: the same, the only one, the last one, the radio (but on television!), etc. | It turned out that Aquaman was the only one who could retrieve the Lost Trident of Atlanta. |
| before a noun which, due to its locality, can refer to only one particular thing (sorry, I can’t make it any clearer… the examples should help) | Check it out – Arthur is talking to the fish. (referring to the fish – and other sea creatures – that were in the Aquarium). Please pass the salt. (the salt on the table we’re sitting at) |
| before a noun which has become definite by the addition of a clause or a phrase (hmmmm, indeed!) | the boy who can breathe underwater, the place where he was born, the time when life was simpler |
ZERO ARTICLE (water, boys)
| WHEN TO USE? | HOW TO USE? |
| before uncountable nouns | Make sure you don’t bring in sand on your shoes. |
| before plural countable nouns | Swimmers have to practise a lot. |
| before abstract nouns, which are mainly uncountable | love, hate, revenge, work, beauty Revenge is a dish best served cold. |
| before names of languages and school subjects | I love English… I wish I could understand Maths. |
| before names of materials, minerals, etc. | The Trident of Atlant was forged from Poseidon’s steel. Her hair was made of seaweed. |
| before names of most streets, squares and parks | Hyde Park, Madison Avenue, Oxford Street BUT: the Main Street |
| before words school, college, university, hospital, prison, church when we don’t mean any specific building, just the institution | Quick! We need to take him to hospital. BUT: We’re going to visit him in the hospital. (where he’s recovering) |
| before place names that consist of two words proper name + noun | Brooklyn Zoo, Victoria Station, Heathrow Airoprt, Cambridge University BUT: the University of Cambridge |
| before names of most companies and shops | McDonald’s, Harrods, Nike, Sony |
| before names of meals | breakfast, lunch, tea, dinner, supper What does Aquaman usually have for breakfast? |
| before expressions consisting of a noun + a number | page 187, room 205, platform 10 |
| before the word most | I like most fish. BUT: He’s the most annoying dude! |
| before the word television | They watch television all they long. BUT: Turn on the TV – Aquaman is on! (we are talking about the device here) |
| before words work, bed and home | He doesn’t know where home is. |
That’s all for now… And enough it is, my young students. Go and do good by articles! Trust that they are to help you be more accurate in formulating your ingenious thoughts. Also, put some interesting cases in the comments below.