Why do we like fantasy? Is it because our grey lives bring us down so much that we need a springboard to set us off on a quick escape from reality? Sadly, that’s the case for some people. Or maybe because we know that there’s something else out there, something beyond the constraints of our own limited imagination? …Which we all know that there is. Or perhaps, and I’m sure most of you will find that to be true, we come across people, creatures, beings, entities or other concentrations of energy that resonate with our own vibrations.
Why do we feel this way about them? It’s a complex issue. Each of us has a different ground for experiencing such an instant connection. Some people like to imagine that they are heroes / heroines, capable of standing up to evil, protecting the weak, or even saving their world, their universe, or their multiversum from annihilation. Others opt for the opposite side – giving way to their evil fantasies or yearnings, finding comfort in the ‘unreal’ depiction of their darkest deepest desires. It satisfies their hunger for doing bad things, without actually doing them, and – perhaps more importantly – without the punishment that may follow. Who doesn’t appreciate a fully-rounded evil genius, right?
For some people, however, and I’m among them, the characters simply seem to be their reincarnations or some kind of residue of their past or future selves.
I’m not sure yet whether I was or I will be Legolas, but there’s no doubt in my mind that pointy ears and parkur-like agility are part of my being… in no way manifested or even hinted at in this lifetime. Disappointing indeed! In the beginning, I thought I was just having a crush on Orlando Bloom. A suspicion quickly verified and dispelled after seeing ‘Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl’. I’m sure that’s how Luke felt when he found out that Leia was his sister. Only weirder – since I realised that Legolas is me! …or I’m Legolas?… Same difference.
Well, speaking of similarities…
Comparing stuff to other stuff, especially in a foreign language, can be tricky. Sometimes our perception of things and the connotations we have of them simply don’t correspond with those of other people’s. On other occasions, we may even know the correct, linguistically and socially accepted expression, or the one that actually functions as a legit saying in our mother tongue, but the calque that we so intricately weave doesn’t resonate with the cultural and social consciousness of our foreign interlocutors. It’s a truth universally acknowledged that the ability to (correctly!) use proverbs and sayings in another language is a sign of our command of that language. And sure we can spend years studying and absorbing the history and culture of the nation, travel to and through the country, meet the people, learn their stories and pick those little nuggets of knowledge in the process… or we can do it the hard way and memorise some of the most commonly used ones.
I can offer you a sneak peak to the latter. We can distinguish two major groups of similes: as…as similes and like similes.
Side note: remember that similes belong to the colloquial register of language so use them wisely. Some of them may actually be offensive – I marked them with an asterisk (*).
AS … AS …
as alike as two peas in a pod – mostly used variations: two peas in a pod or: We’re like two peas in a pod.
as bald as an egg – completely bald, like Master Roshi; also in use: as bald as a coot
as big as an elephant / a house / a whale – basically you should get away with any objectively big item. I would stay clear of using yo’ mama, though!
as black as coal / night / pitch – check out my post on colour idioms, by the way.
as blind as a bat / a mole* – completely blind
as bold as brass – without beating about the bush, confident or brazen, very forward: She told her boss, as bold as brass, that his idea was idiotic. It’s hard to believe that she can be as bold as brass.
as brave as a lion – I can easily think of other brave animals, but apparently it’s not enough that lion is the king of animals… or maybe it’s because of his widely documented bravery that he became the king. Another ‘chicken – egg situation’, I suppose.
as bright as a button – intelligent and quick-thinking
as bright as the sun – clear, straightforward; may also mean promising (when we talk about the future)
as busy as a bee / a beaver – very busy
as clean as a whistle – very clean
as clear as a bell – used to talk about sound
as clear as day / crystal – very easy to understand, obvious
as clear as mud – not clear at all. Surprise!
as cold as ice – I think it’s quite self-explanatory
as cool as a cucumber – I could never get that one, but I love the sound of it. Always makes me think of a cucumber in awesome shades and with handlebar moustache. It simply means extremely relaxed, calm and in control of one’s emotions
as cunning as a fox – can be said about a plan or a person
as dead as the / a dodo / a doornail – weeeeell… lifeless – when applied to people, but also outdated, a thing of the past – when used to describe objects, trends, etc.
as deaf as a post* – completely deaf
as deep as the ocean – or as the Halls of Mordor
as different as night and day – quite different indeed
as drunk as a lord* – hammered, sloshed
as dry as dust / a bone – very dry
as easy as ABC / pie / falling off a log / as shooting fish in a barrel – I’m not sure if the last one is easy, but it’s definitely cruel
as flat as a pancake – …or the Earth, according to some ideologies
as free as a bird – a simile that has already inspired many songs and I’m sure resonates with quite a bunch of people trying to find their way in this life
as fresh as a daisy – so fresh and so clean, clean
as funny as a barrel of monkeys – obviously! Who doesn’t crack up when they see such a hilarious thing, right? You can also call someone ‘a barrel of laughs’ as a sarcastic comment to their cheesy joke or pathetic prank
as gentle as a lamb – that’s probably why they once became the symbol and – indeed – the object of ritualistic sacrifice
as good as gold – this phrase refers to children’s behaviour, meaning obedient and well-behaved.
as happy as a clam / a lark / as the day is long – I simply must favour the first one for its sweet connotation with The Drunken Clam in Quahog, Rhode Island
as hard as iron / nails – impossible to break or penetrate
as heavy as lead – mind you, it’s lead /led/ as in the chemical symbol Pb
as hot as hell – for me – since I don’t really believe in hell – it would rather be Crematoria
as hungry as a bear / a wolf – or me…
as innocent as a lamb – these poor guys again!
as large as life – when you say that someone is as large as life somewhere, it means that you are surprised by their presence in that place: I was convinced that Sam had returned home, but there he was, as large as life, standing in the cave.
as light as a feather / air – or as most American yoghurts
as mad as a hatter – crazy, hence the character of Hatter in Alice in Wonderland
as mad as a hornet – extremely angry, furious
as nutty as fruitcake* – completely nuts! We can call someone a (complete) nutter, we can say that they are barking mad, or a fruitcake. Be careful, though. A fruitcake is also an American slang and derogatory word for a homosexual man.
as old as the hills – really ancient
as pale as death / a ghost – and this is how most people look when they see death or a ghost. Coincidence?
as poor as a church mouse / dirt – penniless, unable to make ends meet
as proud as a peacock – so delighted that one feels the need to show off their tail… let’s hope they stop there!
as pure as snow – as it used to be, before all that pollution business
as quick as lightning / silver / a wink – very fast, like those kids from the Carl Douglas song
as quiet as a mouse – yes, these guys are quiet
as serious as cancer – a grim simile, but to the point
as sharp as a razor – an important simile in the time of Barber Shops Renaissance (at least in Poland)
as sick as a dog – vomitting
as sick as a parrot – feeling bad due to frustration or disillusionment
as silent as the grave / the dead – doesn’t get more silent than that… a dead mouse in a grave perhaps
as slippery as an eel – of an evasive person
as slow as a snail / a tortiose – I don’t know about that – I have heard of many daredevil tortoise escapes
as smooth as silk / jazz – or, perhaps slightly less poetic, smooth as a baby’s buttocks
as sober as a judge – why do I get the feeling it’s ironic?
as solid as a rock / the ground we stand on – also: as steady as a rock; unmovable, very stable; or firm, trustworthy, dependable
as sour as vinegar – it can be taken literally to describe taste (e.g. of milk that’s gone bad) or to talk about a person’s unpleasant behaviour or ill temper
as stiff as a board – that’s how you feel after a long flight
as straight as an arrow – to talk about objects: literally, without any bends, or to talk about people: reliable, honest, truthful
as strong as an ox / a horse / a lion – … of course, the king again!
as stubborn as a mule – Gimli comes to mind as well
as sure as death and taxes – inevitable, unavoidable, inescapable
as sweet as sugar – my favourite condiment, no doubt!
as tall as a giraffe – really? Not a lion?!
as thin as a rake* – obviously, it has some negative connotations; thin always seems to sound negative, slim is what you’re going for
as tough as leather / nails / old boots – I dare say, an extreme opposite of Mr Glass
as welcome as a skunk at a lawn party – a clear vivid image, don’t you think?
as white as a ghost / a sheet– white with horror or fear
as white as snow – beautifully white
as wise as Salomon / an owl – hey, wait! Aren’t you forgetting about your buddy – Mr Lion?
When in doubt and unwilling to make an ass of yourself in a social situation, try using a somewhat universal simile: as … as can be, e.g. as crazy as can be, as bloody as can be, as weird as can be, you name it!
LIKE…
to be like a red rag to a bull – to be irritating or able to anger somebody
to be like a bear with a sore head – to be in a very bad mood
to be like a bull in a china shop* – to be clumsy
to have a head / brain like a sieve – to be forgetful
to have eyes like a hawk or to watch someone like a hawk – to have very good eye-sight or to scrutinise someone
to eat like a horse – to devour food in large quantities
to eat like a bird – to eat very little, like a pecking bird
to fight like cat and dog – to have frequent fierce arguments
to fit like a glove – to be a perfect fit
to drink like a fish* – to regularly drink a lot of alcohol
to sleep like a log / a baby – to sleep soundly, a deep healthy sleep
to smoke like a chimney* – to smoke great amounts of tobacco and other smokable substances
to stand out like a sore thumb – to be very noticeable, obvious in an unpleasant way
I think that’s enough for one day.
Can you think of any – perhaps unusual – similes? Please share in the comments below!